‘How are you?’ is one of the most asked questions I personally got since I moved to Vancouver.  To be honest, I think it’s not a usual thing to do in Indonesia. Mostly we ask this question to someone  that we have not seen or met for quite a long time. We don’t usually ask this to someone that we  just met yesterday or two days ago. Whereas, I get this question almost every day when I meet  someone, even if I just met them yesterday. One of my Indonesian friends even feels overwhelmed  by this question because he thinks that it sounds more like a formality. I also once thought like that  and I always gave a template answer, “Oh yes, I am really good. How’s yours?”. Until one day, I was  struggling to answer that question. I couldn’t say that I was okay because I was not, but I couldn’t  even explain the reason, not only because of my English but deeper than that, because I didn’t even  realize and understand the situation I had. And at that time, this simple question had made me  realize one thing: that I had already lost my time—precisely, I had lost most of my time to realize  every situation and understand it. I even failed to know what’s inside my mind and heart. 

Based on this personal experience, I also realized that many things in our present day have  also taken lots of precious moments out of our consciousness. These things could be problems,  anxiousness, overthinking, bad relationships, grief, or anything else that easily leads us to not giving  any attention to everything that happens around us. However, we are okay to feel that way because  we are still human with all the complexity we have. That’s also why Rob Walker, a journalist and  educator, in his book The Art of Noticing, tried to explain how we can get our consciousness back  amidst lots of distractions in our modern living era through simple but creative actions. Even a robot  could have a crash on their programs and hardware, but still, we could not let this situation have  control over us. We have to overcome this situation. So, how do we do that? What can we learn  from Jesus’ sayings in these verses that can prevent us from losing too many precious moments in  our life? 

In this story, there are two different actions of Mary and Martha when Jesus came to their  house. Mary chose to sit near to Jesus and listen to the teachings Jesus gave. On the other hand,  Martha did something that was usually done by most women in an Ancient Israel context. Yes,  unfortunately we are talking about a context where women were still domesticated and considered  lesser than men. However, culturally speaking, Martha was not wrong at all. She did what women  usually do when there’s a guest in their house, which is to serve them from the kitchen. In fact, Mary  was the one who did the wrong thing by sitting and listening to Jesus in the living room. Moreover,  at that time, a woman was not allowed to sit and learn from the Rabbi or the religious teacher  directly; they should learn it from the man in their house, whether it’s their father or husband. Jesus  in this context was considered a Rabbi, and it means Mary also did something inappropriate. So,  why did Jesus criticize what Martha did instead of Mary? 

Firstly, I want to make sure of my position that I am not blaming Martha for what she did, even  though many interpreters considered and judged Martha as the wrong person. As I already  explained, culturally she was not wrong at all. Instead, Martha is the victim of what the world shapes  people into—what it wants—until she could not get full consciousness over herself and her actions.  She did all of those things to serve Jesus and the other male disciples because it’s the usual thing  for women to do at that time. However, this had taken the precious moment from Martha to have  an intimate time and relationship with the Rabbi, Jesus. 

Secondly, there are two keywords in this passage that Mary used to take the precious moment.  The first keyword is ‘sit down’, or in the Greek original text written as parakathizō (Gr. Παρακαθίζω).  This word not only literally means ‘sit down’, but also has a figurative meaning as an action to stay  close and intimate to someone. In this context, Mary chose to parakathizō, or to give her time and  space to be intimate with Jesus because she wanted to know Jesus better. The second keyword is  ‘to listen’. In the Greek original text it is written as akouó (Gr. ἀκούω), which refers to both physical  and spiritual actions of listening. In physical terms, this word means hearing voices or sounds with  ears, and in spiritual terms this action refers to someone’s behaviour to embrace something they  heard with their mind and heart—so they are not only able to hear the voice but also  comprehensively embrace and understand it. 

Mary had done these two actions when Jesus came to her house, so she could get what Jesus  described as ‘the better part that won’t be deprived of it’. I need to clarify one thing about this  statement, and we have to look back to its original text in Greek. The term ‘better’ is written as  agathos (Gr. ἀγαθός). It’s not limited to what visibly looks good or seems better, but this word  conveys a very deep meaning of both the source and the result. Agathos is good because it emerges  from God and it absorbs into someone’s life. Mary succeeded in realizing and choosing the Agathos when Jesus came into their house by taking a moment to slow down, pulling herself from every  ‘usual’ action she had, and choosing to disrupt the comfort zone. 

I had failed to get the Agathos that I believe God is always serving in my life every day, because  I was too carried away by the anxiousness, worry, and overthinking about my future since I arrived  in Vancouver. Even though, when I was still in Indonesia and I had this situation, I usually went to  hike a mountain. I went for 3 or 4 days to give myself more silent time with God through nature,  because my spirituality type is natural, so it means I can feel more intimate and closer to God—be  more able to ‘hear’ what God is saying to me through my encounter with plants and animals I found  on the mountain. That’s why I am also very interested in the worldview of Indigenous communities  on their relationship with nature, like how the First Nations communities in Canada maintain deep  spiritual ties with the land—because it really helps my spirituality type to grow. However, I failed to  do this practice because I was too carried away by my problems and my uneasy situations, even  though I am living in one of the best cities because of its beauty and nature around. 

Sisters and brothers, reflecting on my experience and learning from today’s Gospel reading, I  encourage us to do what Mary did. The two keywords that I mentioned above are also useful for us  to get the Agathos of every precious moment in our life. God’s word is always served and can be  found not only through the pulpits in church buildings or the hymns we sing every Sunday, but also through every encounter we have with people on the street, with someone whom we don’t know  before, and also with nature that we depend on.

Now, the Gospel has shown us an offer so we don’t lose a chance to take the precious  moment in our life. Whether it’s our worry, anxiousness, grief, overthinking, or many uneasy  situations we have been dealing with, please take a moment and sit near to God so we can  experience the intimate relationship with God through everything around us. Our conditions may  not drastically change, but they will grow and lead us to a very precious thing that won’t be deprived  from us.